Type Four: The Romantic
Fours, often called Romantics or Individualists, are motivated by a need to be special, understood, and to experience their oversized feelings. Driven by emotions, Fours reside in the Heart Triad and they focus inwardly on their own deep feelings. Never wanting to be seen as ordinary, Fours are often creative, sensitive, and moody, and they aren’t afraid to sit for awhile in the depths of sadness or nostalgia. They believe they are missing something essential that keeps them from being complete, and they envy the apparent wholeness and happiness they see in others. Yet above all else, Fours must be true to themselves, so the thought of acting like everyone else in order to fit in is unthinkable.
At their best, Fours engage life with fullness and authenticity, able to bear witness to pain without feeling the need to fix it. At their worst, Fours misunderstand others and pull away from them, over-identifying with their feelings of sadness with an overbearing intensity.
Fours at a Glance
- Basic Desire: To be understood and known for your authentic self
- Biggest Fear: Being insignificant or inauthentic
- Deadly Sin: Envy
Your wing is one of the two numbers on either side of your main type. You may lean in the direction of one of these types and pick up some of its characteristics.
- Fours with a Three wing want to be both the most unique and the best, which sometimes manifests as being overly dramatic or attention-seeking. They have a competitive energy yet they are able to dial back their quirkiness in order to be socially acceptable.
- Fours with a Five wing tend to be more introverted and unconventional, feeling no need to be noticed or fit in with the crowd. They are quietly different and often spend time alone.
Stress & Security
- In Stress: Fours take on qualities of Twos, repressing their own needs and becoming excessively dependent on others. Craving attention, they will want reassurance and affirmation from loved ones.
- In Security: Fours take on qualities of Ones, becoming disciplined enough to tackle their creative ideas and bring them into reality. They are more centered and connected to the present, able to have feelings without acting on them.
You’ll Know You’re a Four if You’re:
Content adapted from The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile. Type names also appear at The Enneagram Institute®.